As I receive the rejection from DSO (Defense Science Organisation), I reflect upon how sure I was that it was God-directed. So much so that I did not really apply for other jobs. All comes back to the big question of hearing from God. Don't think I will find a complete answer on this side of eternity, but one thing I have learnt is never to be boastfully sure. But faith is to be SURE of what is unseen right? I see it now as a tension between faith and mercy.
James 4:13-16
Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that." As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil. Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins.
I used to think that praying 'If it is the Lord's will' reflects doubt despite having read this verse before. There is more for me to understand and apply this truth. For now, I believe that one's assurance can lie in self, not realising God's underlying mercy and grace. My confidence in DSO was largely based on the fact that I was a Singaporean with a PhD. It's tricky too, because confidence in God extends to confidence in self too. Reminds me of the centrality of our identify in Christ. Maybe I should learn how to pray 'If it's Your will Lord.....' (confidently).
1 comment:
Hi Andrew.
I read recently, it's not a question of whether God is on our side but a case of are we on God's side??
Maybe sometimes we see opportunities that seem right - they seem to tick all the right boxes both from a personal requirements and Christian requirements point of view and we feel sure that God is directing us down this way. But maybe it isn't really because we still apply our human thinking to it? Then God being God does His own thing which seems contrary to what we felt. The world may view your rejection as a bad thing but trust in God cos it must be the right thing in His grand scheme of things (which we can never really know fully whilst on this earth!)
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