It's been a humbling journey. I have swung from being confident in making a difference in work to fear of being a bad testimony.
Just yesterday, a colleague was teaching me how not to include certain things in emails so as not to reflect badly of the department. Also, am needing guidance on basic matters. M is willing to guide and help me, but I suspect I do not portray the outward competence of a PhD graduate. That is OK :)
Much of Christian talk surrounds worldiness, how people are after the wrong things in life and self-centered. This has caused a critical spirit in me and I have elevated myself, thinking that I am better because I have made a better choice and am not self-centered. However, dealing with more people in the office have opened my myopic eyes to realise that there is more love and care in the world than I thought.
In fact, according to Romans 2, the person whom I view as selfish is actually myself. Perhaps my way of dealing with my own ugliness is to project it unto others-an area I need to repent of and come back to God. I have no rights to judge or even condemn a person's actions or words, therefore there is no need to cast any opinions. I believe that would help me to be more at ease and joyful in the office.
1 comment:
Hi there Andrew...
I'm from your church, and I stumbled upon your blog by chance. I just wanted to let you know what a great job you've been doing penning your reflections here, because they have been very inspiring. I admire your earnestness in trying to draw close to God and relying on Him. You've given me much food for thought for my own spiritual journey, even as I, like you, struggle with my own imperfections and insecurities.
Contrary to what you may believe, I think you write beautifully, because you do so from your heart, and your words honor the God whom you so clearly love.
Blessings.
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