While doing my experiments this evening, was listening to IDMF Talk 5 by Edmund Chan on the inner life. He used the incident of Jesus with Mary and Martha to talk about the importance of the inner disposition above activities and geography.
God broke my heart towards the end of the talk. Was reminded that all I needed to always bear in mind is God's heart for the lost. All self-defeating barriers broke down and frustrations melted away.
Have been distracted by many things, especially issues dealing with my longing for a partner. Try as hard as I might, I find it hard to fed it off. Realise the only way is to fill my heart with God's word and His heart for the lost.
As God spoke into my heart in a powerful way, breakthrough also came towards some personal judgement I have with a tough situation I faced last week.
Praise Him. He alone is sufficient.
Wednesday 26 September 2007
Tuesday 18 September 2007
Shoulder subluxation before church
It's 20min before church. I left the house, just like any other sunday, preparing my heart for church. There was enough time to drive to church and find a parking space-wasn't a need to rush. As I was getting into the car, I stretched my left hand out to put my bag in the side passenger seat. That's when it all began. My left shoulder popped out of its joint. In medical terms, it's called subluxation, a partial dislocation. It first happened in my secondary school days (over 10 years ago) whilst I was playing basketball. I have had at least 10 repeated incidents since then. My case isn't serious to the extend where it needs surgery, but it remains a problem. It catches me offguard everytime it happens, and I can remember many of them clearly, because they are painful. There are some interesting ones, including one where it happened during a dancing class. Whilst practising, I suddendly went to the side of the room and held my hand against the wall high up in a desperate attempt to guide my arm back into its socket. Everyone was equally shocked and amazed. It happened once during my sleep as well-that was scary. The time where I really have to be careful is whilst in the driver seat of a car and I need to stretch backwards towards the back passenger seats.
Was in great pain after it happened in the car today. It came out at an angle which do not happen often. I relaxed as much as possible and tried to put it back, but just couldn't. I can usually put it back, usually within minutes. 10 minutes have passed, this time is much harder. In my mind, I was thinking I might have to go to the hospital to seek medical attention. It finally popped back after half an hour and I was thankful that I was still able to make it to church today. Though I missed worship today, but God revealed many insights to me in that 30min.
1) Interestingly, during my QT this morning, I thanked God for my health and body. This incident is a reminder of how blessed I am to have a functional and healthy body. It's only when I was immobolised where I could appreciate the freedom of having functional limbs.
2) The original and intended design is for my arm to rest in the socket of my shoulder. Anything beyond this design is disastarous. Lord, help me to lead my life according to how you have made me, to glorify You and to be happy with my uniqueness.
3) The car was packed just beside a huge tree outside the house. Mark has intentions to cut it in prevention of it falling. I asked myself in that 30min, what would happen if that tree suddendly falls at that time (yeah...one of those crazy thoughts), am I ready to meet God? Lord, help me to always be prepared with jars of oil with my lamp, ready to meet you when you come.
4) I prayed to God that I would be able to pop my shoulder back. I didn't know when it would happen, but it eventually did. God hears and He answers, but there may be a period of waiting. This period can sometimes be painful but we can only hang in there.
God gives us
TWO HANDS to provide practical help to the weak, oppressed and needy around us
TWO LEGS to bring the gospel out
TWO EYES to see people through His love
A MOUTH to share our testimonies and proclaim that Jesus is Lord
A MIND to be filled with His Word
A HEART to love Him and others
A BODY to take care of
and of course...our tastebuds to enjoy food :)
Be a blessing.
Was in great pain after it happened in the car today. It came out at an angle which do not happen often. I relaxed as much as possible and tried to put it back, but just couldn't. I can usually put it back, usually within minutes. 10 minutes have passed, this time is much harder. In my mind, I was thinking I might have to go to the hospital to seek medical attention. It finally popped back after half an hour and I was thankful that I was still able to make it to church today. Though I missed worship today, but God revealed many insights to me in that 30min.
1) Interestingly, during my QT this morning, I thanked God for my health and body. This incident is a reminder of how blessed I am to have a functional and healthy body. It's only when I was immobolised where I could appreciate the freedom of having functional limbs.
2) The original and intended design is for my arm to rest in the socket of my shoulder. Anything beyond this design is disastarous. Lord, help me to lead my life according to how you have made me, to glorify You and to be happy with my uniqueness.
3) The car was packed just beside a huge tree outside the house. Mark has intentions to cut it in prevention of it falling. I asked myself in that 30min, what would happen if that tree suddendly falls at that time (yeah...one of those crazy thoughts), am I ready to meet God? Lord, help me to always be prepared with jars of oil with my lamp, ready to meet you when you come.
4) I prayed to God that I would be able to pop my shoulder back. I didn't know when it would happen, but it eventually did. God hears and He answers, but there may be a period of waiting. This period can sometimes be painful but we can only hang in there.
God gives us
TWO HANDS to provide practical help to the weak, oppressed and needy around us
TWO LEGS to bring the gospel out
TWO EYES to see people through His love
A MOUTH to share our testimonies and proclaim that Jesus is Lord
A MIND to be filled with His Word
A HEART to love Him and others
A BODY to take care of
and of course...our tastebuds to enjoy food :)
Be a blessing.
Tuesday 11 September 2007
Climbing up Snowdon
Snowdon is the highest mountain in Wales and England, standing just above 1000m. Climbed it this morning with Bernard, Tracy, Yan Shiang and her mum. Everyone did very well as it wasn't a easy climb. There were sections with continous steep ascends and we had to catch our breadth every now and then. We started our climb at 7am in the morning (second car in the carpark) and took almost 3 hours to get to the peak. The weather was excellent, though the wind and high altitudes made some part of the walk chilly. During the start of the walk, Tracy was often lagging behind with the camera in her hand. Too bad I didn't have my swimming trunks, because the lakes looked very inviting. Don't know whether there are any dangerous fishes in there though. It was good to begin early as it was only on our way down where we started bumping into people.
We left yesterday evening as the plan was to spend the night in Snowdonia and start climbing in the morning. God's hand was already upon the trip before it began. As usual, I wanted to do as much work as I could before setting off. Also wanted to change the car's radiator water which I left till the last minute. I completed the procedure of draining the water out and filling it up with coolant and water. I thought I was doing fine until I tried starting the engine and the temperature gauge was rising. I thought it takes some time for the water to go through the system and so I hurried back to my room to rush through the last part of my packing. Went back to the car after a few minutes and the temperature guage needle was at its highest, it went beyond the red warning zone! I knew that something was wrong and the car would probably not make it to Snowdonia, maybe not even out of Nottingham. After trying out some stunts, including shaking the car and trying to top up more water, the temperature would not fall. I was already late to pick up people, my packing wasn't completely done and worst of all, I may have to cancel the whole trip because of the car. Then I stopped everything for a moment and went down on my knees and pray. After praying, I didn't immediately get up, but pondered abit and cleared my mind. Then, it struck me, 'What if the water hasn't got into the system yet'. It was indeed that problem and the car survived a 330 miles roadtrip carrying 5 people.
Some reflections.
1) Prayer works! If I had continued my frantic search for solutions and not got down on my knees, I am not sure if the entire trip would have been possible.
2) The water level seemed sufficient on the top because it didn't flow through the whole system to cool the engine down. Am I internalising God's word throughout my entire mind and heart?
3) My dad said that air in the system would have prevented the water from flowing through it. Do I need to purge anything in me for God's word to dwell richly in me?
Was reading Psalm 111 in the morning and took it out to read during the walk too. Somehow I just couldn't get too far beyond this verse 2.
'Great are the works of the LORD;
they are pondered by all who delight in them.'
In the sermon this week, Colin challenged us 'Is a bird with it's beak facing skywards singing glorifying God?' I never thought whether an animal could glorify God. His answer was 'Yes, because it was doing what it was created to do'. Throughout the walk, I was reminded of this point when I saw the mountain and the sheeps. Must say God has allowed me to see more of Him through nature during this trip.
Colin added 'What if humans did what he was created to do?' Hum....good question to consider daily :)
We left yesterday evening as the plan was to spend the night in Snowdonia and start climbing in the morning. God's hand was already upon the trip before it began. As usual, I wanted to do as much work as I could before setting off. Also wanted to change the car's radiator water which I left till the last minute. I completed the procedure of draining the water out and filling it up with coolant and water. I thought I was doing fine until I tried starting the engine and the temperature gauge was rising. I thought it takes some time for the water to go through the system and so I hurried back to my room to rush through the last part of my packing. Went back to the car after a few minutes and the temperature guage needle was at its highest, it went beyond the red warning zone! I knew that something was wrong and the car would probably not make it to Snowdonia, maybe not even out of Nottingham. After trying out some stunts, including shaking the car and trying to top up more water, the temperature would not fall. I was already late to pick up people, my packing wasn't completely done and worst of all, I may have to cancel the whole trip because of the car. Then I stopped everything for a moment and went down on my knees and pray. After praying, I didn't immediately get up, but pondered abit and cleared my mind. Then, it struck me, 'What if the water hasn't got into the system yet'. It was indeed that problem and the car survived a 330 miles roadtrip carrying 5 people.
Some reflections.
1) Prayer works! If I had continued my frantic search for solutions and not got down on my knees, I am not sure if the entire trip would have been possible.
2) The water level seemed sufficient on the top because it didn't flow through the whole system to cool the engine down. Am I internalising God's word throughout my entire mind and heart?
3) My dad said that air in the system would have prevented the water from flowing through it. Do I need to purge anything in me for God's word to dwell richly in me?
Was reading Psalm 111 in the morning and took it out to read during the walk too. Somehow I just couldn't get too far beyond this verse 2.
'Great are the works of the LORD;
they are pondered by all who delight in them.'
In the sermon this week, Colin challenged us 'Is a bird with it's beak facing skywards singing glorifying God?' I never thought whether an animal could glorify God. His answer was 'Yes, because it was doing what it was created to do'. Throughout the walk, I was reminded of this point when I saw the mountain and the sheeps. Must say God has allowed me to see more of Him through nature during this trip.
Colin added 'What if humans did what he was created to do?' Hum....good question to consider daily :)
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